


Snow Epiphany

by earthseraph



Series: 30 Day OTP Christmas Challenge [3]
Category: Captain America (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Fluff, M/M, Post-Captain America: The Winter Soldier, Snowmen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-12-09
Updated: 2014-12-09
Packaged: 2018-02-28 18:04:13
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,379
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2741951
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/earthseraph/pseuds/earthseraph
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>“I think we can make this one you.” Steve said, nodding to himself, “I can find a bigger stick for your left arm and carve in my shield.”</p>
<p>Bucky looked down at the snowman that was apparently him and frowned, “But I’m not an Avenger.”</p>
<p>(Day 8: Making Snowmen)</p>
            </blockquote>





	Snow Epiphany

**Author's Note:**

> I'm so sorry I haven't been writing these but I got super busy and finals and yeah, enjoy!

The snow was against Bucky’s face and ears where his knit hat didn’t cover. Not the kind of cold he related with HYDRA and cryo chambers, but a pleasant cold that he associated with Steve, Brooklyn, and their childhood. It was kinda nice.

The snow was freshly fallen, probably happened some time last night while they were watching some movie Clint swore on his life they had to watch, but it wasn’t a thin layer. No. It was a thick layer, thick enough where they had to put their boots on so the snow wouldn’t soak their pants or shoes- because what’s worse than wet socks? And cold enough where Bucky couldn’t go out in one of Steve’s threadbare hoodies but had to slip on one of his thicker coats that Tony bought him because he couldn’t be seen with people not in designer threads.

All in all, the snow was thick as fuck, and Bucky hasn’t made a snowman in _forever_. 

He patted the snow into a fat ball with his hands, the metal one getting some snow stuck to it because it liked to get as cold as it was outside, and his other hand stinging where the snow was melting through his gloves. He rolled the ball towards where Steve was building his own and smiled at the pair they made. 

Two super soldiers, in the park closest to their little brownstone, possibly the deadliest men on the planet, spending their winter morning making snowmen that resembled something like the Avengers team. 

“Remember when we used to do this as kids, Stevie?” Bucky called, his breath coming out in fat white puffs, still rolling the ball of snow across the park. 

Steve looked up from where he was patting down the base of their snowman and smiled, nose a little red, and bundled up like something out of A Christmas Story, “Yeah, Ma would always get mad at me because I’d get sick after playing in the snow, but those were the best days of winter.” He rested his blue gloved hands on his hips and looked around the park, “The days where we’d play in the snow without the slightest care in the world, only caring about our snowman and how to make it look better than any other kid’s on the block.”

Bucky laughed at that memory, both of them together were- and still are- competetive little shits, “Ours were the best in the city, Steve, and you damn well know it.”

“Until you decided to eat the carrot nose.” Steve noted, cocking his head to the side with a toothy grin on his lips, “Then our snowman was missing an essential part to him and everyone else’s looked a thousand times better.”

“What can I say? I had a knack for carrots.” Bucky shrugged before heaving the lopsided ball of snow off the ground and up on Steve’s base, “What Avenger is this?”

Bucky looked around the park at their other snowmen and counted the team off. They had Nat and Clint by the jungle gym, a little stick in Clint’s hand for an arrow, and a red stone they found for Natasha’s lipstick. Over by one of the larger trees were Thor, a little snow hammer next to him, and something that was supposed to be half Bruce and half Hulk on the other side. Behind Bucky was Sam, he was laid out on the ground with a snow angel’s wings as his own, and finally Tony, who they stuck on the roof of the jungle gym, the snowman’s face carved like Iron Man’s mask. 

“I think we can make this one you.” Steve said, nodding to himself, “I can find a bigger stick for your left arm and carve in my shield.”

Bucky looked down at the snowman that was apparently him and frowned, “But I’m not an Avenger.” And he wasn’t. Sure, he went on missions with the team and went to all their meetings, but more as Steve’s right hand man and husband. Him and Steve were a package deal, either both or none, but that didn’t mean he was an Avenger. He had too much red staining him for that. 

“Not technically, no,” Steve muttered, a little pout on his lips, making another ball for Snow Bucky’s head, “but to me you are. And I think that’s all that counts.”

“Steve-” Bucky started, opening and closing his mouth because what was he supposed to say to that? Steve was, and always will be stubborn, and Bucky telling Steve the fact that no, he’s not actually an Avenger, would just make Steve square his shoulder, clench his jaw, and spew all the reasons _why_ Bucky’s an Avenger to him, and Bucky didn’t know if he could deal with hearing that right now. He might just melt with Steve-loving-warmth like the snow will melt in the sun.

Steve sighed one of those _boy are you an idiot_ sighs and stopped forming Snow Bucky’s head to look at Flesh and Metal Bucky, “Look, Buck. I know you still think you’re something of a bad guy but you’re not.” He shook his head and walked two quick steps to where Bucky was standing. He pulled off the glove on his left hand and held his hand up, silver band shining in the morning light. “You’re not bad because what you blame yourself for wasn’t your fault. You’re my husband, the guy who loved me when I was skinny and sick, the guy I love more than I can even explain. The guy I’ll jump after this time around. Okay, you might be a little rough around the edges, but I love you.?”

Bucky kept his eyes on Steve’s ring and tried to swallow the lump forming in the back of his throat because _shit_. He’s heard all this before- probably every day since he allowed Steve to visit him in that white cell- but he’s never really listened. Yeah, he’s gotten better. He doesn’t get nightmares every night like he used to, he’s not worried he’s going to become The Asset again, he’s gotten better. But he just hasn’t listened. 

And maybe it’s because of the snow, the snowmen, that nostalgic feeling running through his veins, and Steve being stupid and perfect. Or, maybe it’s because he’s finally came to his senses and realized that maybe, just maybe, it’s not his fault. Hell, it might even be Steve’s stupid face and his Irish pale hand, waving that band on his finger around that makes Bucky feel calm, and like he belongs. Maybe it’s a mix of all of it, and, to be honest, it probably is. And the words are seeping into Bucky’s skin like the snow settling into his gloves.

Steve’s words are sounding more than pointless, more than something that Steve has to say because he’s biased. They’re sounding honest and true, like Bucky can believe them. 

Like Bucky _does_ believe them.

“You okay?”

Bucky blinked out of his little epiphany to the feeling of Steve’s cold hand on his face- ring making it colder- and the man himself close enough where they’re sharing each other’s breath. He brought his hands up to Steve’s own, moving the hand to his lips, and kissing it. He closed his eyes for a moment, taking the scenery in, the smell of Steve in, and breathed out, “Yeah, I just- I” _I think I finally see what you’ve been telling me and I can never thank you enough_ “- I just love you a lot, Stevie.” 

“Yeah?” Steve asked, a little breathless, snow sticking to his eyelashes. 

Bucky nodded, kissing Steve’s palm again, “Yeah.”

“Well, I love you lots too, Buck.” Steve pulled his hand away and trailed it down Bucky’s arm, Bucky took the hint and laced their fingers together, “Now, let’s finish your snowman, then mine, and go home to our warm bed.”

Bucky smiled and nodded, “Sounds like a plan, baby doll.”

He watched Steve mess with the snow for a moment before letting a shaky breath out and shutting his eyes for a moment.

_It wasn’t him, he didn’t do those things, he was the gun and they pulled the trigger, Steve’s his husband, Steve loves him, It’s not his fault.._

**Author's Note:**

> [My Tumblr!](http://santabuck.tumblr.com/)


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